Porn consumption, OnlyFans, can quickly grow ugly, it’s an unending struggle for boys and men, especially in a society of loneliness, and because women just aren’t that interested any more. They prefer to share the top dogs than give sex and affection to an average guy. It’s simple economics.
A boy must observe, then crush and burn out what is rotting within.
The Second Umbilical Cord.
You don’t have that much time left.
Alcides was a strong, but violent man. In a fit of rage, he mauled his wife and daughters to death. When the red haze subsided, he was struck by confusion, then grief. Awareness of his own vices and behavior slowly sunk in. He took the road to redemption, and it would be a long one. Hence he was known as Heracles. The first task given was to kill the Nemean Lion, raised by Hera. A beast that had been terrorising the lands. So Heracles searched and found its cave with two entrances. Curiously, it cannot be killed by arrows, fire or steel, but by wrestling it, chocking it out after a long struggle. Neither could he skin the lion, until he used one of the beasts own claws.
The Ego. Selfishness. Blind to the harm it causes to others and oneself. Heracles is often depicted with his club and wearing that lionskin on his back.
For his second task, the hero is told to descent into the swamp of Lerna and kill the serpents within. To lure it out he uses flaming arrows. He chops off one head, but two grow back. A huge crab, sent by Hera, pincers the hero to the ground. Heracles calls for the aide of awareness, who burns off the severed necks one by one, crushes the crab that pincered onto him. As the struggle with desire takes place, the ego latches on to what it believes it does not possess,it assumes this will replace what is missing.
The hydra represents twisted desire. As humans we can never really undo this, It’s the symbol of a “twisted” consciousness-energy which along with Orthrus (lying), Chimera (illusion) and Cerberus (sense of separation in the body) leads us to think we are isolated from others and nature. Within lie roots of guilt, shame and mental fears.
To have some Ego and to feel Desire are human qualities.
Pornography is a destructive and sabotaging vice for boys and men and as long as you feed it, consume it, it will grow and fester in your mind. You tried to stop. Too eagerly and carelessly, the root desire will come back up in different forms, with a vengeance.
Speak and verbalise the little monster, drag it into the light..
Search for the origins and what's feeding it.
Consistent, strategic, guerilla warfare. Grind it down in its own lair.